Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Do you remember trying to set these things up?


Some brave soul is trying to sell this thing on Pinkbike right now. Good luck.

Monday, September 22, 2014

Thursday, September 18, 2014

More bad music

Play this on mute:





Then play this over the top of it:



You're welcome.


At this point every mountain bike film maker should just start emailing me before they pick a song, because left to their own devices they consistently blow it. There's apparently a big divide between the emo artsy people that gravitate towards holding a camera or editing videos, and the people who go fast on bikes and have to suffer through the videos those emo artsy guys make.

Don't even get me started on this epic loam slash bro stuff:

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

For the benefit of look-at-me big word unfunny engineer guy

What I wrote:



"I wasn't there this year, but I did the same thing to about fifty different bikes and forks when I was at InterHell last year. I also like the "stand on one side of the bike, grab one side of the bars and press down on the crank" test. It's amazing how much you can make a bike or component flex when you don't care about safely riding it after you're done with your "test." Science, dude."




What look-at-me big word unfunny engineer guy wrote:

"Inorite, Charlie? Because the FOS,fatigue,S-N curve,failure criteria, plastic deformation limit and their respective quantitative values were produced, and thus compared to known limits for the particular material and geometry, all during your simple observation of deflection, right? I mean, it's science.

You never cease to entertain, like the village idiot, with your petulant and arrogant ignorance."



I think we had a misunderstanding, look-at-me big word unfunny engineer guy, and I think this video will help you to better understand what I wrote:

Monday, September 15, 2014

This is why you go to Interbike



I wasn't there this year, but I did the same thing to about fifty different bikes and forks when I was at InterHell last year. I also like the "stand on one side of the bike, grab one side of the bars and press down on the crank" test. It's amazing how much you can make a bike or component flex when you don't care about safely riding it after you're done with your "test." Science, dude.


Thursday, September 11, 2014

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

What everyone's been waiting for

Do you remember sitting around with all your bro's at the shop, drinking beers after the workday ended and wondering "when is Ellsworth finally going to release a carbon Dare?"

Today your questions have been answered:


Due to the patented ICT linkage design the engineers at Ellsworth weren't able fit in the 15" BB height that consumers were demanding, but they believe the 14.9" BB is a good compromise.

Monday, September 8, 2014

TEAM ROBOT remembers


He learned from the best: The Rennie.

If these ankles could talk


Team Robot secured a brief interview with Josh Bryceland's left ankle as it was going into surgery.

"Kill me now."

-Josh Bryceland's Right Ankle.




Music sucks

Play this:





Then watch this on mute:





You're welcome.



Sunday, September 7, 2014

All Hail Lord Bummer


Like General Zod, but less charming. New poll on the right.

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Podium worthy


David Trummer should get a medal just for riding this thing. Unrideable.

Minnaar was fastest in timed training

If Minnaar wins three times in a row I'm going to quit watching these things.



I would drown a puppy if that's what it took for Sam Hill to win.



Obviously everybody everywhere is cheering for either Sam Hill or Josh Bryceland, but let's talk about who we want to lose. Here's my top three, with number one being the biggest bummer if they win:


3. Greg Minnaar


I'm happy for you Greg, I'm just not that happy for you. Three in a row seems a little excessive.




2. Anybody from France


This isn't an attack on Loic Bruni as much as it's a standard, longstanding World Champs rule- don't let the French guy win. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3o5SB1CfgU


1. Lord Bummer


If he wins there is no justice in this world.