Monday, September 16, 2013

Breaking stuff

If you haven't seen the photos or video of Lorenzo Suding tearing the headtube off his new GT yet, trust me, you will. It's bad.

And of course everyone and their brother is talking shit about GT. Of the nine comments on the Pinkbike video, 11.1% of them said "F#$% that, I'm selling my Fury right away." A couple of thoughts on this subject:

1. First of all, there's no way that guy's actually going to sell his Fury, that's just internet tough guy talk. All of us know that guy is probably 38 years old, a dentist, and is a lower midpack Cat 2 racer in the one or two races he enters every year, and he's going to rethink that idea oh, say, 15 minutes after he "contributes to the dialogue" on PB. $20 says he has a carbon one from 2010 anyway.

2. Have you seen that gap in person? It's the biggest scariest gap on the planet. It's no less than fifty feet, but my bet is it's closer to sixty, and the videos from there do it absolutely no justice at all. It's a straight bunnyhop. When we course hiked it last year the gap was a joke, the sort of line you throw out there as a "what if?" and don't seriously consider, and no one in the whole pro field even tried it until late in the pre-quali practice session. When they did try it last year, it was straight up super hero shit. Kirk McDowall was there this year, and not only did he qualify, a feat I have still never accomplished, he got 37th in finals. And he didn't hit the gap in his race run. You need to understand that this gap is not the long wooden lip at the end of Dirt Merchant. This is the gnarliest gap that the gnarliest rider you know would ever hit. Casing it is the most violent thing I can think of doing to a bike. I literally cannot think of anything I could do to a bike that would be more destructive, other than running directly into a tree. Realistically, you probably suck and will never put 1/10th the force into your bike that Lorenzo did when he cased the mega death gap.

3. Bikes break. I hate to say it, but bikes break. They just do. Sometimes the head tubes even rip off. There is a picture on Pinkbike right now of every major downhill bike that you've ever seen or ridden with the head tube ripped off. Giant Glories, V-10's, Konas of course because that's the classic and owners were downright proud to post their very own "Stinky with a head tube ripped off" photo, Demo 8's, Devinci's, Treks, Knolly's, whatever. At some point someone ripped the head tube off every bike model you've ever ridden. If ten more videos stream in of GT's breaking head tubes off, so be it. That would convince me there's a real epidemic. Until then, you people are stupid. This is akin to the "I didn't buy a Demo because Gwin couldn't win on it" argument. What Lorenzo and Gwin do is so far from your realm of existence that there are almost two separate sets of physics.

4. The list of what ifs is a mile long. We don't know if that was a production bike, and we don't know if the bike was already compromised and he rode it anyway (which, dirty little secret, happens all the time at races if you're not the top 20 in the world). For all we know aliens zapped it with a aluminum destructor cannon and GT corporate specifically told him not to run that bike and he did anyway because he's Italian and that's just how he rolls. What we do know is that he was the very last GT world cup talent to get the new one, so he's not exactly on their hot list of people to get bikes to. If it was compromised, who knows what the fix-it process looks like. Overnighting bikes to Scandanavia is not cheap, and Lord knows Atherton Racing's not going out of their way to give him one of Gee's bikes as a loner.

5. Lorenzo was fine. If you haven't seen the clip of Loris Vergier getting KTFO three turns up the hill at Hafjell, he *probably* ate shit because his front tire was 2 PSI too low.  At the speeds they're going everything can kill you. Loris Vergier looked 100% clinically dead, and he got hurt going around a turn. Lorenzo snapped his head tube off on the scariest gap in the world and walked away. So, A) the scariest thing that could ever happen and your worst fear come to life = Lorenzo's totally fine, and B) the thing that these guys do every day and that could happen every single time you ride = Loris looked like he'd be relearning how to talk and how to color with crayons inside the lines again.

MOUNTAIN BIKING IS INHERENTLY DANGEROUS AND EQUIPMENT FAILS. IF YOU DON'T KNOW THIS ALREADY KILL YOURSELF OR QUIT AND PICK UP QUILTING.


I don't care about GT's sales. I don't care about Specialized sales. I don't care whether or not you buy those bikes. I just hate the idea that people are stupid enough to let one single event or person impact their opinions so negatively. You people are sheep.

4 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Sam Hill didn't hit the gap. People are dumb, end of story.

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  3. Not to take anything away from the gap but I believe Elliott and Bernard hit it first run last year.

    http://www.vitalmtb.com/videos/member/DirtTV-Hafjell-Worldcup-Day-One-Practice,15329/iceman2058,94

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  4. Where is the video/photos of Lorenzo's crash? I tried PB's terrible search algorithm and got nothin.

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