Thursday, July 9, 2015

Best idea ever

One of my friends said we should fundraise to send every salaried freerider to the World Cups next year. Maybe not the full series, but at least half of it. That works out to be about $15,000 per rider, to do half the series, but I think that's money well spent to finally address this pervasive idea that pops up every time a freehucker posts a video of him displaying upper-level Cat 1 pace. Every time the internet chimes in with comments to the effect of "he should race the World Cup."

Never mind the fact your local hero super racer dude who eats, sleeps and breathes racing and destroys all comers by a minute at your regional or even National races still gets 157th with a good run when he goes and races the world's best. No,  "bike skills are bike skills" says the internet. If sick shredders like the BROastal crew can get so pitted up on their home trails then surely they can get so pitted anywhere.



Yes. Yes he should race the World Cup. Best idea ever. Let's make this happen. We only need to raise $105,000 to send the first class of seven out there.

26 comments:

  1. Pitted means fast right?

    ReplyDelete
  2. maybe a better question is not who is fastest but rather a measure of each disciplines relative influence.

    How many bikes does a downhill racer sell for a brand win lose or draw? How many bikes does a free rider effectively sell by doing manual labour and hucking in a video.

    In the end both are marketing tools involving different skills, strengths and weaknesses. Ultimately how many bikes, wheels, bars etc getting sold is the metrics that counts.

    Which discipline sells more bikes?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fully support this

    ReplyDelete
  4. but shawn neer is a god among men

    ReplyDelete
  5. Maybe Clay Porter could make the video! WINNING

    ReplyDelete
  6. I would donate up to 500 pennies to this cause.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Or better yet, just invite some of them to the Hardline event and see how that goes. It's the gnarliest DH dudes and the their FR counterparts. That'd be neat.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You must be home and sick of the hot weather.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I second hardline, it would be fun to watch Lacondeguy blow up turns and wiggle his way down that one while having a minute put in to him by everyone, resulting in him throwing his most collosal tantrum of all time.

    ReplyDelete
  10. ^ I couldn't even finish his recent video. It seemed like he had a neurological disorder manifested in bike movements.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Neurological disorder? It's called cocaine.

    ReplyDelete
  12. So when you post a video of a bmxer or skateboarder do you complain about how slow they are or how poor their form is? Dont you see the contradiction here? These "freehuckers" are paid to do what they do, cuz not everybody is willin to jump off a 80 ft cliff and land it

    ReplyDelete
  13. ^^^ You don't get it. Its not that The Head Robot hates freehuckers. He hates freehuckers trying to look fast as opposed to *being* fast and the resulting chatter that "OMG this dude would totally own a world cup" or whatever the kids on Pinkbike are saying. He's preaching about good solid bike handling being the truth and wiggling your way down the hill being some sort of fraudulent form of bacting (bike acting).

    And 80 feet? 80 canadian feet mayyybbbeee...

    ReplyDelete
  14. ^^^^^ What part of free-ride do you guys not get? They ride however the fuck they want to because they are not in a race. There are different styles and disciplines in every sport, you don't compare a longboarder to a street skater, or a freestyle skier to a dh skier, their end goals are completely different. A few little pre teen pinkbike goons thought that Andreu could be a serious wc threat after the video and then the robot kid blows it up like a big deal and has continually beat the dead horse post after post. He has some funny shit to say sometimes I will give him that, but let the freeriders be free man and come up with some new material. Most people know that guys like Gwin and Minaar are faster than the huckers. If they build their own trails and don't claim to be the fastest wc racer without backing it up, i don't really see the big deal. Also yeah I believe the cliff he dropped off of at rampage was 80 ft down, maybe 70 , but either way fucking insane.

    ReplyDelete
  15. let the freeriders be free maaaan

    ReplyDelete
  16. its all about the FREEEEEE RIIIIIIDE bro

    ReplyDelete
  17. Freee ride ain't freee mother fuckerrs

    ReplyDelete
  18. You know when you argue with someone and they're angry because they fail to see what is actually being argued? In this situation, nothing will help. The angry one only grows angrier when you try to explain that your point and their counterargument form a non sequitur.

    Jeff Brines, you're fighting an uphill battle.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Why bother. No one cares about race results

    ReplyDelete
  20. "^^^^^ What part of free-ride do you guys not get?..."

    Generally I would argue your position sentence by sentence but I don't think that's going to work in this case. So let me try articulating this in a different way.

    I love Happy Gilmore. Its an awesome movie. I also love watching dudes do those long drive competitions. That said, if you want to be a good golfer you are better off watching Rory or one of the top PGA Tour dudes and emulating their swing. Not the swing of long drive champion Jeff Flagg or Adam Sandler's hockey windup. On the other hand if you want to really be a solid bike handler emulate Greg, Aaron or any of the top 10 WC guys - not wiggle fest spastic man.

    Andreu is a hell of a rider and he never said "I bet I could stomp on the WC circuit" - so that's not the problem. And just like Happy Gilmore or long drive competitions - if Andreu's style of riding is your jam, do that. Nothing wrong with it and yeah, Andreu sends. He's good at going big and looking awesome in the air. Head Robot is just trying to make extra-sure we don't confuse *looking* fast for *being* fast. Simple as that. He wants to objectively prove this by sending one of the freeride brahs to a WC to show just how off the back this riding style would be when it comes to "fast".

    I obviously care. I care because I am (helplessly) trying to save the kids and the bike world from an errant boondoggle (is there any other kind?) whereby bacting (bike acting) becomes as big of a deal as the real thing. It already heappened in skiing and the bummer is you've got dudes who absolutely crush getting overlooked for the KC Deanes and Sierra Quitiquits of the world. And that sucks. It sucks even more that there is a culture of this shit whereby you don't actually have to be good just look good - and since the general public can't tell the difference - skill - the real kind- gets pushed to the background as some sort of cool attribute that isn't really required to getting paid. (what I just rambled about doesn't really exist in mountain biking unless you are Aaron Chase - but we're dabbling in dangerous waters)

    I have more analogies if this isn't getting through to you.

    ReplyDelete
  21. That said, if you want to be a good golfer you are better off watching Rory or one of the top PGA Tour dudes and emulating their swing.

    Lawd-a-Merseybeat! Brines is a financial analyst, amateur-but-wannabe-pro-skier-and-mtb'er, and GOLF EXPERT!

    Imitating someone's swing =/= using swing best for your own anatomy, propensities, temperament, skills. But you go ahead there, Brines-not-Laxgear.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Haha. Hyperbole much? Did I say "precisely imitate"? I said "better off". I don't think I'm alone when I say I learn something from watching the world's best riders just like I learn something watching the world's best golfers. Obviously we're all special snowflakes and what works for me may not work for you. I don't think I ever argued against this.

    Maybe I suck at writing (likely). Point is I'm going to learn more to better my overall game from your PGA tour players than Captain Longdrive. But you go ahead there and totally miss my point.

    Jeff "amateur-but-wannabe-pro-skier-and-mtb'er" Brines (love my new nickname - thx!)




    ReplyDelete
  23. Dammit Jeff, I told you it was an uphill battle.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I, for one, welcome our new Head Robot overlord.


    ReplyDelete