Friday, October 2, 2015

What we're all thinking

With the notable exception of Lopes and Bingelli, this is what every single rider in the pro field wants to do in their Sea Otter race run:

Stand Up & Pedal - More Mountain Bike Videos

Fact: by the time he pulled over, he'd already hit 95% of the photographers and video guys.

If you're not on the first page of results at the Otter, trust me, no one is going to know whether you got 26th or 79th, whether you had a flat, whether you finished your run, or if you got abducted by aliens midway down the track. As far as established media is concerned, manual-no pedal guy from the video had a complete race run.

This is partly because the rest of the track looks like hell and the jumps and berms up top always look decent, but mostly because the pro photo guys are as burned out on Sea Otter as the racers.


Side note: look how small this XL frame from 2013 is. Circus bear on kid's bike.

When this photo landed on Pinkbike, you could tell it's a Margus Riga photo by how far down the track he walked to take it. None of the other photographers on retainer at Pinkbike would ever bother walking to the end of the first uphill for photos. This is clearly the work of a young up and comer, full of piss and vinegar, of dreams and hopes, trying to find a new angle and set himself apart artistically from the established guys. In other words, a try-hard.

The young guys don't realize it's a long season and there will be plenty of time to flex your artistic muscles on your own projects and with other clients. If you're even at Sea Otter, this is not an artistic exercise. This is purely commercial, and the only thing that matters is meeting the extremely low artistic expectations of your corporate overlords. Meeting those expectations can and should be done on the first jump straight at the top of the hill, easy walking distance from the road, and preferably seated, with a beer in hand, fully embracing the absurdity, hopelessness, and nihilism of your existence.

A philosophy of Sea Otter photography.
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30 comments:

  1. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 11:26 AM

    1st comment.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 11:27 AM

    Piss flaps.

    ReplyDelete
  3. skreefOctober 2, 2015 at 11:47 AM

    did you just call Margus an up and comer!

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 12:39 PM

    You seem like the kind of guy who would be interested in Nihilist Arby's

    https://twitter.com/nihilist_arbys

    "Nihilist Arby's ‏@nihilist_arbys Sep 29
    They found water on Mars. Know what that means? It means that as we suffer & die here, there's some useless fucking water on Mars
    Enjoy Arbys"

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 1:13 PM

    Channeling your inner Hunter S Thompson there bud.

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 3:05 PM

    I think Chuck is aiming for people to start randomly punching him in the face.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 5:30 PM

    Even a whip off contest is less fucked out than sea otter dh.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Joe the JuiceheadOctober 2, 2015 at 6:26 PM

    .....And then I come out of the wood and throw a big cup of piss in his face! WaRhati - your a bitch.

    ReplyDelete
  9. WutangOctober 2, 2015 at 8:19 PM

    Throw me a frickin bone here! I entered that shit into the googles translate and the same fucking shit came out of the answer factory! Either you're an alien or you just randomly entered letters because your drunkass forehead was laying on top of the keyboard. Make an effort Pablo!

    ReplyDelete
  10. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 11:48 PM

    Without your permission I'm giving big time props for the peeps who make it all happen:

    http://www.seaotterclassic.com/index.cfm/sponsor_guide.htm

    Lopes and Bingelli have both defeated you many times here and this is how you show respect? I've workd on this track and I don't so appreciate the criticism without offering ways to make it a sick world cup level world championship dh track etc on the bottom part you call hell. Put up or shut up. or just build a trail and prove yourself. You can no longer criticize any trails.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. AnonymousOctober 4, 2015 at 3:32 AM

      Wow! You MADE that track? Well it must be fucking awesome then!! I've heard all about your work, Mr Anonymous! Did you build the parking lot at Las Vegas airport too cause that looks like a freaking hoot on a dh bike aswell!!

      Delete
  11. AnonymousOctober 2, 2015 at 11:51 PM

    ^^^^go home you're drunk

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousOctober 3, 2015 at 12:25 AM

    ^^ I seems like every other article there's one of these "show respect/you can't criticize the track" guys...

    ReplyDelete
  13. PAK DENDIOctober 3, 2015 at 12:55 AM

    Saya ingin menyampaikan kepada
    seluruh TKI yang bekerja di negeri orang ,,
    saya PAK DENDI seorang TKI DI MALAYSIA
    pengen pulang ke indonesia tapi gak ada ongkos pulang
    sempat saya putus asa, apa lagi istri dengan keadaan hamil
    dan gaji aku pun buat makansehari2 saja, sedangkan hutang banyak.
    kebetulan istri saya buka-buka facebook mendapatkan
    nomor MBAH KASENG katanya bisa bantu orang melunasi hutang
    melalui jalan TOGEL ,,dengan keadaan susah jadi saya coba
    hubungi MBAH karna saya pikir tidak ada salah,nya kita coba dan minta
    angka bocoran MALAYSIA angka yang di berikan MBAH 6D dan alahamdulillah ternyata betul-betul tembus 100% bagi saudarah-saudarah di indonesia maupun di
    luar negeri apabila punya masalah hutang sudah lama belum lunas
    jangan putus asah beliau bisa membantu meringankan masalah anda dengan meriktualkan angka togel ghaib SINGAPURA/HONGKONG/MALAYSIA 2D,3D,4D,5D, Atau 6D yang betul-betul tembus
    hubungi MBAH KASENG di nomor 0823-1434-8847 silahkan anda buktikan sendiri
    demi allah saya sudah membuktikan angka dari MBAH sekrang giliran anda untuk MEMBUKTIKANNYA!!!




























































































































































































































    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousOctober 3, 2015 at 1:32 AM

    I agree with Pak.

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousOctober 3, 2015 at 9:06 AM

    you could build a dh track on a sidewalk and those dudes still think you can't criticize it. you have a shit track at a shit venue its never going to be good no matter how much lipstick you put on it. take the criticism, not based on your work effort, but based on the venue. you could go dump 100 truck loads of boulders on it and make it look like Bromont, or ya just deal with riding shitty terrain. no way around it.

    or what Pak said.

    ReplyDelete
  16. AnonymousOctober 3, 2015 at 9:20 AM

    PAK and WARHADI are both infinitely more entertaining than 1st comment guy and piss flaps guy.

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousOctober 3, 2015 at 7:55 PM

    Holy shit my drunk ass made it onto a team robot post! Fuck Sea Otter too

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousOctober 4, 2015 at 12:27 PM

    That idiot paid $ 105 to hit 3 jumps.

    ReplyDelete
  19. AnonymousOctober 4, 2015 at 2:38 PM

    ^ but at least he looked cool for the kids on pinkbike

    ReplyDelete
  20. The Shit AbyssOctober 4, 2015 at 9:08 PM

    @12:27 & 2:38

    Get the logs out of your asses, the homie got his number plate from a junior who broke himself off and couldn't ride that weekend or something along those lines...

    ReplyDelete
  21. AnonymousOctober 4, 2015 at 10:04 PM

    Thank goodness. We were all very concerned about whether or not he had wasted his entry fee.

    ReplyDelete
  22. AnonymousOctober 5, 2015 at 6:09 AM

    Fools!
    Any robot could tell you that Pak Dendi is revealing where 2 Pac lives.

    ReplyDelete
  23. AnonymousOctober 5, 2015 at 12:14 PM

    Looks like he was "downhilling" a Santa Cruz 5010. How is that bike even allowed at the start gate if this course wants to appear legitimate? What's next, a 27.5+ bike at a race?

    ReplyDelete
  24. AnonymousOctober 5, 2015 at 4:20 PM

    @ 9:08 (one of the kids on pinkbike mentioned earlier)

    nobody really cares? but great job coming to his rescue

    ReplyDelete
  25. UnknownOctober 5, 2015 at 9:35 PM

    Coastal crew news demands robot comment.

    ReplyDelete
  26. UnknownOctober 6, 2015 at 4:41 AM

    Saya ingin menyampaikan kepada seluruh TKI yang bekerja di negeri orang saya ibu hermawati seorang TKI DI MALAYSIA pengen pulang ke indo tapi gak ada ongkos sempat saya putus asah apalagi dengan keadaan susah gaji suami itupun buat makan sedangkan hutang banyak kebetulan suami saya buka-buka internet mendapatkan nomor MBAH RONO katanya bisa bantu orang melunasi hutang melalui jalan TOGEL dengan keadaan susah jadi saya coba hubungi MBAH RONO dan minta angka bocoran MALAYSIA angka yang di berikan 4D TOTO ternyata betul-betul tembus 100% bagi saudarah-saudara di indo mau di luar negeri apabila punya masalah hutang sudah lama belum lunas jangan putus asah beliau bisa membantu meringankan masalah anda hubungi MBAH RONO di nomor (_085_340_489-469_) ini asli bukan rekayasa atau silahkan buktikan sendiri...










    Saya ingin menyampaikan kepada seluruh TKI yang bekerja di negeri orang saya ibu hermawati seorang TKI DI MALAYSIA pengen pulang ke indo tapi gak ada ongkos sempat saya putus asah apalagi dengan keadaan susah gaji suami itupun buat makan sedangkan hutang banyak kebetulan suami saya buka-buka internet mendapatkan nomor MBAH RONO katanya bisa bantu orang melunasi hutang melalui jalan TOGEL dengan keadaan susah jadi saya coba hubungi MBAH RONO dan minta angka bocoran MALAYSIA angka yang di berikan 4D TOTO ternyata betul-betul tembus 100% bagi saudarah-saudara di indo mau di luar negeri apabila punya masalah hutang sudah lama belum lunas jangan putus asah beliau bisa membantu meringankan masalah anda hubungi MBAH RONO di nomor (_085_340_489-469_) ini asli bukan rekayasa atau silahkan buktikan sendiri

    ReplyDelete
  27. AnonymousOctober 8, 2015 at 12:35 PM

    "on retainer at Pinkbike"... hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah.......

    ReplyDelete
  28. KhorsieOctober 12, 2015 at 10:12 PM

    hahaha I gave iggy my race plate so he could rip that race run!

    ReplyDelete
  29. UnknownOctober 14, 2015 at 6:13 PM

    Awalnya aku hanya mencoba main togel akibat adanya hutang yang sangat banyak dan akhirnya aku buka internet mencari aki yang bisa membantu orang akhirnya di situ lah ak bisa meliat nmor nya AKI NAWE terus aku berpikir aku harus hubungi AKI NAWE meskipun itu dilarang agama ,apa boleh buat nasip sudah jadi bubur,dan akhirnya aku menemukan seorang aki.ternyata alhamdulillah AKI NAWE bisa membantu saya juga dan aku dapat mengubah hidup yang jauh lebih baik berkat bantuan AKI NAWE dgn waktu yang singkat aku sudah membuktikan namanya keajaiban satu hari bisa merubah hidup ,kita yang penting kita tdk boleh putus hasa dan harus berusaha insya allah kita pasti meliat hasil nya sendiri. siapa tau anda berminat silakan hubungi AKI NAWE Di Nmr 085--->"218--->"379--->''259'

    ReplyDelete