Monday, August 31, 2009


"deicide" cookie monster vocals, old guys head banging, and firm believers in satan..... what more could you ask for?? okay how about a transformers cartoon.

here you go.


Eddy Merkin: Can anything stop the animal?

All of the goodness in this post was stolen from our friend Kyle's blog for his (also) imaginary bike team that doesn't actually exist but has a retarded blog that the three or so of them post things on that no one reads, a little team called Eddy Merkin.

This shit's for real. Their team has a logo and everything. If you don't get the joke, check wikipedia for any listings on what a "merkin" is.

Anway, their team is awesome. They beat us in the "badass taglines" category, here's just a small sample of ditilled awesome from their 4 page list:

Eddy Merkin:
Sorry about your confidence

Eddy Merkin:
Shot putting innocence

Eddy Merkin:
Is down if you are

Eddy Merkin:
Breathe it in

Eddy Merkin:
Dries his hands on gods beard

Eddy Merkin:
I win

Eddy Merkin:
Full on hard on

Eddy Merkin:
Can anything stop the animal?

Eddy Merkin:
Allows Gravity

Eddy Merkin:
“Thanks, I know.”

Team Robot:
Yeah, I know, they're winning.

EMBED-Couch Airbag Explosion Surprise - Watch more free videos

Pure Genius here: (Click this link)

For all the people who bought WRX's, you're doing it wrong:

More goodness from Team Eddy:

"If you watch any of these, watch this, the best"

I stole everything off their page.

Things that are cool: robots

Saturday, August 29, 2009

The Knight Rider

The flash of genius, the moment of inspiration:

Fixed gear bikes still suck

But Chris Akrigg doesn't:

Team Robot Editor's Note:

Team Robot in no way condones the use of the words "fixie," "fixie lifestyle," "one gear one life," "track bike barspin," or any other words that conjure up images of wannabe poor urbanite 20, 30, or 40 somethings who try to extend their adolescence as long as possible with things like awkwardly tight jeans, messenger bags, and v-neck t-shirts.

So just to clarify:

Fixed gear=bad

Chris Akrigg=good

Other things that are cool: Team Robot

Just when you thought we were all dead, prepare to think again!

Stickers ARE IN!

If these look sweet to you, email us at Actually, we never check that email, so email me at my actual email address:

Stickers will cost money, so send in like $5.00 and we'll send you enough stickers to look almost as awesome as Team Robot. The stickers are thanks to our buddy Eric Johnson and his design firm/badass art studio Hankbuilt. Thanks Eric.

But seriously, we got We had to add "killsyourface" to the end of our URL, and still nobody had Bitches.

In other news I bought all my polishing stuff. My bike is going to look dope. And yes, the mini-powerball is already annihilated from the grit in my aluminum frame. I'll be washing my bike and polishing wheel a lot.

Things that are cool: me

I've haven't posted in forever. There are a couple of reasons for that. Besides this site being an unimportant piece of internet garbage, me hating myself, my teammates, and everyone who reads this site, and my complete lack of creativity, I've also just been really busy.

Why have I been so busy? See the title of this post: I'm really cool. So I've been traveling around to more races than you. So check out my hard work in the form of these sweet pictures that I stole from other hard working individuals, and we can all appreciate how cool I am:

Monday, August 24, 2009

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Metal monday and other junk

Darin shreds

Darin Read taking runs in the NW from Mike Hammond on Vimeo.

this is really funny.

robots would just weld it back together with our lazzer eyez

Oh yeah METAL.

we used to listen to this on cassette every fucking day it was the only tape we had.

minivan+metal+threetards= bad decisions

Monday, August 3, 2009