Thursday, November 11, 2010

29er downhill bikes

I've talked about 29er bikes before, but today I'll let this video do the talking:

Yes, that's right. Intense Cycles, maker of some of the coolest, smartest, most badass bikes ever is now responsible for this contraption:

I'm really pissed now. I'll do the talking from here. Tell me with a straight face that a 29 inch tire with exxxxxtra long spokes could put up with this sort of abuse:

It's just retarded. Maybe this would work if the trails you ride are dead straight.

But maybe if I learned to enjoy ripping my rear tire off the rim every single time I hit a berm then I would be pumped on it. I'm sorry, but rear wheels are already exactly as weak I can tolerate, before making them 3 inches bigger.

Oh, they thought about that you say? Intense also made a 26 rear/29 front bike?

Cool, I don't know why I never thought of that. Apparently making the ride characteristics of a bike totally unbalanced is better? This is such a breakthrough. While we're at it, let's also try:

1. cutting an extra 3 inches off of one side of the handlebar

2. turning off all suspension adjustments on either the front or rear shock

3. running radically different tire pressures and tread patterns front and rear

4. running clips on one foot and flats on the other

There are so many options!

Other thoughts:

The same gearqueers running DH bikes with XC rims and alloy nipples, $4 bladed spokes, and running tubeless no matter how many flats they get are likely to be the same gearqueers who want to be on the cutting edge of this 29er DH fad.

Do you realize how much more weight AND inertia a 29 inch wheel has? If you were worried about the weight difference between double-butted and straight gauge spokes, let me put this in perspective. A 29er wheel is going to weigh about 30 spokes more than a 26 wheel.

That means that after all the times I've had to listen to your retarded ass explain the performance advantages of a lighter rim strip, you are going to throw all of those "critical" advantages away, and make your wheels 20% heavier? AND have more leverage acting against that weight?

You suck.

Also, this is pretty much what I think of all 29er riders everywhere:


AllKnowing said...

Go fuck yourself, fuck 29ers, fuck tubes, long live tubeless.

stikman said...

Chill the fuck out, intense is just tinkering around, none of this is in production.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, different sized wheels between front and back is a TERRIBLE idea. I mean, look at dirt bikes, they have different sized wheels and they don't hit nearly the size of jumps or gnarly terrain that mountain bikes do. Jesus you'd think those idiots would pull their heads out of their asses.

And yeah, making bigger wheels automatically makes them weaker too. I mean, you can't actually make them stronger by adding more material or using different material. That would just be silly.

And it's not like bigger wheels actually roll over obstacles better or anything. Jesus, I can't believe the idiot MTB producers are still using 26" wheels. 20" is the wave of the future!

Anonymous said...

Cry baby... I ride both 29ers & 26 inch. I love both for different reasons. Get a fucking grip you crying ass tard. Damn your like a baby Hitler.