Tuesday, September 25, 2012

That's not funny!

Oriental themed "geisha" lingerie from Victoria's Secret? Apparently, that's not funny to one Nina Jacinto, a bay area blogger who claims the line highlights "the kind of overt racism masked behind claims of inspired fashion and exploring sexual fantasy that makes my skin crawl." Jacinto did not choose to comment on whether or not run-on sentences also make her skin crawl.

Jacinto expands on her butthurtedness, "There's a long-standing trend to represent Asian women as hypersexualized objects of fantasy," She also took umbrage with the lingerie description as "your ticket to an exotic adventure" and the fact that none of the models for the collection were of Asian descent. "The lack of Asian women here simply exposes the deep-rooted nature of the Orientalist narrative, one that trades real humanness for access to culture."

Tracking Nina's last sentence in graphical form:

By the way, the majority of the text here was copied and pasted from this Yahoo! News article: http://shine.yahoo.com/fashion/victorias-secret-geisha-lingerie-sparks-controversy-one-blogger-201500394.html

I'd just like to take a moment to address the recent trend of mainstream butthurtedness.

Most people take for granted the material wealth, disposable income, and leisure time necessary to be able to afford being butthurt; maintaining high butthurt levels requires a huge commitment of time and work. As such, for most of recorded history, only the upper echelons of society, the uber-rich or the 1% if you will, could afford to be butthurt. Before that, most people had real problems on their mind, like working the fields, securing their next meal, honing their craft or trade, or piling up dead and dying, plague-infested bodies on the local corpse-collector's body cart. Before the 20th century, most people didn't have the ability to spend time and money being butthurt about other people's problems, and so they had to either get over it or mind their own freaking business. Coping techniques for those unable to be butthurt about trivial issues included working, sleeping, talking about things that actually matter, whistling, recreation, or one of the most permanent solutions: just not worrying about it.

As you can see in the above graph, right around the mid-sixties average per capita income began to skyrocket, allowing more and more people access to the otherwise unaffordable world of butthurtedness. This led to ever-expanding butthurtedness the world over, but this rise was precipitous in America, where a new grassroots wave of butthurtedness was sweeping the country by storm. This modern renaissance of butthurtedness in the 60's gave us such ground-breaking revolutions in butthurtedness and complaining as:

The Beatnik/anti-capitalist/counter-cultural movement

 The sexual revolution

The environmental movement 

The Vietnam anti-war movement 

And Arec Barrwin

Ultimately, it was only after the status quo had successfully provided exponentially greater levels of relative peace and prosperity to the ignorant and unthankful youth of America, a level of wealth and comfort that would have been unimaginable to prior generations, that the youth could finally harness their newfound position of power and responsibility to spend their lives complaining about the systems that gave them everything they had. It was at this turning point in history, known by scholars working in the Butthurt field as the CIEP (Critical Irony Equilibrium Point), that the destruction of Western civilization began:

So Nina, what I'm trying to say is, I'm sorry you were butthurt by the mean people at Victoria's Secret who make underwear.

1 comment:

Antonio said...

No pie charts??? WTF!!!

No Pulitzer for you, Mr. Robot