Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Goggles and a half lid


I didn't get the memo and I still don't know what this is all about, but apparently this is the worst fashion travesty in the known universe. My only question would be: compared to what?



Is this supposed to be better?





As soon as you:

A) put on a half lid, and
B) need any form of eye protection whatsoever

you've entered a lose/lose situation. Try as you may, you're going to end up looking like some combination of a spaceman, Larry at the shooting range, and(or) a small child that rides the short bus to school.

You could say "just stop racing enduro," but c'mon people, we gotta pay the bills and keep the lights on around here at ROBOT HQ. Sacrifices must be made.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nathan Riddle does it right; you gotta have the Velcro. I don't care about the looks, goghles feel right.

Anonymous said...

That's because they can't ride fast enough to get watery eyes or keep up with their friends throwing dust up.

Anonymous said...

bros like white rimmed oakleys bruh

Anonymous said...

I didn't know Ali G rode for Yeti...bumbaclot!

Anonymous said...

When you have the #1 plate you can do whatever the hell you want. Race in a tuxedo? Sure. Race in a space suit? No problem. It's hard to hear their complaints from that far up on the podium.

Anonymous said...

THE RIDDLERRR!!!

Adam said...

Goggles are excusable, leaving that bitch-ass-bird-beak roost guard on them is not.

the militarized tater tot said...

Why does Blopes look like a tard 100% of the time

Anonymous said...

The problem is that you've committed the only mortal sin in mountain biking:

Trying to look not like a complete idiot.

You see, mountain biking is the single most unstylish action sport on earth. I know it, you secretly know it. Because most idiots in mountain biking just wish they were MX superstars (no, no idea why that is either), looking like an idiot covered in neon and sponsor logos isn't just acceptable, it's preferred. My advice would be to embrace the idiocy and go full-Lopes/Graves.

That, or at least get Oakley to send you goggles from their snow line-up. You'll lose the useless tear off tabs but gain about 13525474123451435 style points.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous is right. Way too many wannabe MXers in mtb. I've embraced the idiot look. I rock clear sunglasses and XC jerseys. Do I look like a douche? Yes. But I can carry snacks in my fuckin shirt and you can't.

Anonymous said...

http://pic.geekitude.com/d/10986-2/P0000537TronGuy.jpg

THUNDERCRACK said...

SKY WARNER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KenBot3000 said...

The ideal look and colors are akin to an Andy Warhol painting vomiting onto you. And form follows function.

Anonymous said...

ffs just wear a fucking t-shirt and cut offs with some nerd glasses. fuck mtb fashion

Anonymous said...

who cares. wear whatever you want, how you want to wear it. worry about your riding instead.

Pratt said...

just kill yourself already

truth said...

goggles and half lids have invaded the whistler bike park like never before....and good god, those fuckin enduro bikes are now being rented by the hill itself.

so lame, who the fuck wants to look like greg herbold in 1994?

Anonymous said...

"Because most idiots in mountain biking just wish they were MX superstars"

only in so-cal

Anonymous said...

Well at least your form looks decent and you're looking up the trail. Can't ding you on that. Which is probably moar important. Fashion Police got canceled folks. Moose out front shoulda told ya.

GetLaidAnd/OrKillYourself said...

"I didn't get the memo..."

Charlie, YOU ARE THE MEMO.

Anonymous said...

But its racing, its chump shit to begin with, you think people are watching?

Anonymous said...

If it makes you feel better I'll start sporting that look as well, so you won't be the only person made fun of.

Mc Hammerpants said...

Half lid/goggles > fullface/sunglasses.

Joseph Kreidler said...

Ding ding ding we have a wiener! If its sold on the "bike" page for 100% they should stomp those things on the factory floor unless they're barefoot kids making the goggles which I'm sure they are....