Friday, May 1, 2015

You're like a child Donny, who wanders into the middle of a movie

Of the 31 comments currently posted on the Whistler/A-Line/End of the World article, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb here are definitely my favorite because they typify two classic internet argument tactics.

#1: The Didn't Read It's:

Tweedle Dumb is a perfect example of someone who wandered in off the street while the rest of us were mid-conversation. He basically makes my argument for me, albeit in slightly different words, and then says I don't have an argument. Here's the general format:

"You're way off base, all they're doing is [insert exact thing that I said they were doing]."

Making the case decks on A-Line's jumps mellower "so it isn't so bad if you case them"

          ===> Means jumps are less intimidating for squids

          ===> Results in more jamokes on A-Line.

          ===> Defeats the purpose of A-Line and lowers the bar for everyone

As far as your "40 foot drop" comment goes, if you think there were 40-foot drops at Rampage in 2001, kill yourself please. And probably stop reading TEAM ROBOT, because we're going to continue referencing events in mountain biking that date back farther than the three years you've been buying sleeveless Unit jerseys and POC helmets, and freeride flicking loam stashes on fresh trails on your Knolly for your next edit.

Essentially Tweedle Dumb says nothing of value, contributes no original thought, and his response could be boiled down to grunting and the angry retaliatory throwing of feces.

#2: The Didn't Get It's:

To Tweedle Dee's credit, at least he makes a value proposition. "A-Line doesn't matter, it's a squid trail already, you should ride 'real trails,' instead" is what his argument boils down to. Whatever he means by "real trail," I don't know, but I can testify that A-Line is a ribbon of dirt that I've personally ridden a bike on, so in my eyes it qualifies as both "real" and "a trail."

We learned folk call Tweedle Dee's argument the "no true Scotsman" fallacy. He might dismiss trails like A-Line off-hand and might likewise dismiss the growing trend towards dumbed-downedness in prevailing MTB culture, but how will Tweedle Dee like it when the fun police come after his so called "real trails?" Tweedle Dee's focus is too narrow to understand the greater principles at play here, but to quote the great Walter Sobchak, "this affects all of us, man."

By dismissing the validity of the trail in question, Tweedle Dee has robbed himself of the universality of the principle we're discussing. Either the principle applies everywhere, whether we're talking about Whistler Bike Park, your secret squirrel locals only stash, or the city park in your neighborhood, or else it ceases to be a principle and it applies nowhere. If you think trail sanitization and the struggle for a diverse range of trails doesn't affect your local trail area, just wait. Captain Bummer Pants is coming.

As far as being a load of whining bitches, you must be new here Tweedle Dee. That's what we do.


freehuck chuck said...

"you've been buying sleeveless Unit jerseys and POC helmets, and freeride flicking loam stashes on fresh trails on your Knolly"

- can I get that printed on a t-shirt?

Jimmy Mcgarth said...

You may have just called out half the mtb population, all of pinkbike (user's and writers) and a huge portion of the people who will be moving up in the ranks inside the industry. Hats off to you Charlie.

Anonymous said...

I definitely didn't have the energy to read all of that. The impression I got in the first and only half I read is that you are hitting bottom with all of this and will soon stop posting porn links, soon stop riding bikes all of the time, soon have a family and soon wrap up law school and land a real job. And then this blog will go on to be run by a couple of your current van-camp-it-smells-like-poop-in-here PNWDH racer flannel-and-a-mustache bros and it will putt along for a while driven only by the occasional visit from those who remember this blog for how good and relevant it once was. It's been fun!

Anonymous said...

I always thought this place was a second home for Pink Bike users.

Anonymous said...

I remember when Team Robot was an entertaining read.
Its now become a very substandard version of the old HB cut the course website. That website was funny, this one is like some 15 year olds piss poor attempt at trying to be edgy.
All the articles are smack full of the authors suppressed insecurities.

Anonymous said...

Wade Simmons did the big 40 foot huck at the first Rampage. It's why he won. No video of his whole run but there are pictures of it in the mba coverage at the time. The drop is still there, go measure it then kill yourself.

They are also bringing back skill filters to Aline ==> Results in less jamokes on A Line. Go kill yourself again.

Also, what is "the purpose of A line?"

Get airborne on lots big jumps? You still do, the jumps aren't smaller. Now kill yourself for a third time.

S&M Ben said...

I'm with ya man. We are the Titantic (You're Jack, I'm Rose) and Mountain Biking is the big boat that, just today, May 2nd (opening day), hit the Iceberg. Ship is going to sink but most people are in bed and didn't feel a thing (and gonna die)... although maybe you're the guy in the crow's nest who shouts 'Iceberg right ahead'... but then who's my Jack?

Anonymous said...

Unit sleeveless shirts?
POC helmets?

Does someone have sponser envy?

kidwoo said...

Starts at 2:12

Are you guys sure that's only 40 feet? Pretty sure that's like 170.

naked and afraid said...

I fear the commenters have turned on you...

Anonymous said...

Tweedle Dee is just jealous he doesn't have any bike parks where he lives, I don't think his comment needs to be taken so seriously.

Anonymous said...

"will soon stop posting porn links, soon stop riding bikes all of the time, soon have a family and soon wrap up law school and land a real job."

Solid DC reference. Cheers to that.

WhizzzLocDawg69 said...


ruth said...

has anyone seen kyle?