Monday, May 18, 2015

Perfection

I'll be on the road soon, and I wanted to check out a place in Maryland I'd heard about to ride downhill. Apparently some has been/never was photographer used to live out there and it's "SO SICK" just like everyone says their local spot is. Didn't believe it myself until I saw this solid two minutes thirty six seconds of shred your face off downhill destruction no survivors explosion of perfection:



Watch it the whole way through, and then try to pick a favorite part. That's right, you can't. They're all good. No, scratch that, they're all perfect. The fifteen second sky sequence to start things off? The silent, pensive walk up the hill at :46? Hammering towards the camera at :54? The out of his mind drift at :59? The sick double at 1:44?

It's like this video is the blueprint for MTB media. It's the Rosetta stone. Some say perfection is unattainable, and we should settle for goals less lofty, but behold, perfection is here. What  "Iron Horse in SoCal" was for the mountain bike world in 2004, that's what Todd has done for the entire worldwide media landscape in his self-filmed magnum opus. And to think this was published in 2012, undiscovered until today, like gold waiting to be extracted from the living rock. This is the new measuring stick. Is there any need in you left unfulfilled after watching this video? It's like he answered the questions I didn't even know to ask. I feel like I understand not just life better, but the interconnectedness of the whole universe more after watching Todd's work.

If you can't hire Todd to make your next video at least send an envoy to seek his counsel, and equip them with gifts of virgin blood, rare stones, and Marzocchi 38mm seal kits. Seek his counsel and reap the rewards as your enemies weep and bow before you.

Video nerds, Todd is your new king.

34 comments:

brant@shedfire said...

Reminded me of this:-
http://youtu.be/BRzwNycQTok

Anonymous said...

FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Punk Kid from Pinkbike.com said...

^^^ First comment guy- you got smoked. LOL
You snooze- you lose

Brittany Spears said...

What is up with the left and right vertical "out of focus" strips ??? , it's like a post-processed shallow depth of field but 90 Degrees out... i have no comprehension why anyone would do that....

Love to you all,
B.

Humble human said...

Damn,
thought I was immune to your sarcasm:

I really expected a brilliant gem of a video...
Well played Mr. Sponsel!

I gonna kill myself.

Anonymous said...

Aren't there any more deserving targets to pick on than some inexperienced dude on an outdated bike?

Given your unabated hatred of everything german, you could start with this overequipped study in casing: https://vimeo.com/127419608

Anonymous said...

It must have felt good posting this.....

Anonymous said...

Its a guy out riding his bike, don't know what the problem is.

Anonymous said...

meh

Carcharodon carcharias said...

Credit where due, Chaz. Your last 6 mos of entries smell like restyled writing by someone else on the webz. Cheat to win, bro. Cheat to win.

This is why Strobel beat you over the weekend. Cheat, or don't. Your choice, your result. Cheating outside the tape will affect results inside the tape. It's like rhetorical EPO, bro.

Anonymous said...

Hey look: half lid and goggles on sucky pnw trails.

http://nsmb.com/doerfling-riding-sloppy-squamish-gnarl/

Charlie, go eat a fucking sandwich.

Vertigo Cycles said...

My favorite part...it's not actually in the watershed and if he doesn't know he's not there, he can't tell people where it is and fuck it up for the people who ride there.

Charles said...

If you like the song - here's a better vid: http://www.pinkbike.com/video/254305/

ALSO from 2012. Go ride Nepal dudes.

Gor said...

Haha, I thought it's just gonna be some dumb wanna be mtb video, like I've seen thousands, but this really was special... I can't even describe it, it was mind-blowingly funny!

Anonymous said...

Was the video supposed to be funny?

larsNbars said...

"Anonymous Charles said...
If you like the song - here's a better vid: http://www.pinkbike.com/video/254305/

ALSO from 2012. Go ride Nepal dudes."

If there was ever an appropriate use for this song in a mountain bike video, this is it. +1

Anonymous said...

Some beginner made a video of himself having fun riding his bike? you couldn't find anything better to make fun of?

dan the man said...

needs more Sail

Anonymous said...

Yes this was a bit heartless. No need to pick on this guy

Unknown said...

At least he rides more than most humans.
And the music is nice and melancholic.

Anonymous said...

I just want to know how he managed to puncture.

Anonymous said...

I figured this whole thing was classless sarcasm.

And a good example of what's wrong with the internet.

Nice work. Maybe show this to your friends and loved ones. Print it and hang it on your parents' fridge. I'm sure they'd be proud.





Anonymous said...

Are you sure this isn't satire? If it is, it was executed perfectly.

Think about it, this video has every cliche shot, only the riding is laughably mediocre. It seems unlikely that someone would know the trends in biking "edits" so well, but not ride enough to be able to clear those little jumps.

Anonymous said...

is the has been/ never was Dennis Yuroshek? isn't that where he learned how to dh?

Camera Wrangler said...

If that place is "so sick" I can understand how you might think Bend is an attractive place to ride.

Anonymous said...

My 6 year old daughter takes better photos than Dennis Yuroshek

Anonymous said...

You are such a condescending piece of shit. Keep up the good work.

Anonymous said...

http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1468066/images/o-TARAN-KILLAM-JEBIDIAH-facebook.jpg

german fuck said...

The vid is indeed classes better then the usual wannabe crap on the news day in day out. This was below you.

Anonymous said...

yeah that was a little mean spirited eh?

DRFANBLADE said...

I bet all the people that are mad about you making fun of this video are Canadian.

Anonymous said...

I bet you're a typical dumb ass redneck american because you think every canadian is a pussy butt hurt faggot. I live in the great white north and thought this video was even gayer than you.

Jantzen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jantzen said...

I agree, it must be satire.

The deep introspection as evidenced by his facial expression on the way to the trail head; the bike tied down in the bed rather than over the gate; the flats; the full face; the bike; pumping up a tire? Why is that even in this if it's a shred edit?

...all on a trail lamer than the shit those poor oblivious Canadian losers in North Van have to ride LOL! OL! MF's!

Lack of full body armour is the only thing that leaves me wondering if it may be real, but I don't think so. It's brilliant.