"Thankyou. You know that feeling you described in "They're all the same look" where it feels like you're completely alone in your beliefs? That's me. Or it was me. Now I know I'm not alone. Maybe not surrounded by vast crowds of loving, supportive friends; but not completely alone either. So thankyou, next time I ride an IMBA sanctioned highway through my local bushland I'll be a tiny bit less inclined to go home arid slash though my wrists with the blunt edge of a teaspoon.
Steve, you're not alone. And yet, as you ride that IMBA sanctioned highway, you are alone. So, so very alone.
Team Robot is glad to help with the trails, Steve, but as far as your friend situation goes, that's a little out of our wheelhouse. But we'll go out on a limb, just for you, Steve. 'Tis the season, right?
Steve, we just met, so we don't have a lot to work with, but using that short email as an indicator of some of the patterns in your life, here are a few thoughts.
Brushing up on your grammar and spelling is always a good place to start. For instance, your sentence "arid slash though my wrist..." I'm guessing that's supposed to be "and slash through my wrists," but typographical errors like this can take a run-of-the-mill suicidal threat and turn it into a vague short form poem about the costs of corporate farming as a toll on anonymous workers and a juxtaposition of the hands of the one with the power of a larger force. Clarity in communication can be a boon to any relationship, personal or professional, and demonstrating a level of technical competence in language is always a surefire way to attract interesting people.
Additionally, complaining about your state of loneliness can arouse sympathy in the short term, but it can quickly transition into destructive cycles of self-pity that become a burden for not just you, but to all the people in your life. That can be off-putting for most people, and would put a strain on any relationship over time. Speaking of things that put a strain on relationships, those close to you might feel uncomfortable when you conflate the seemingly insignificant vagaries of life, such as bicycle trail design, as reasons to kill yourself.
Suicidal threats are rarely a foundation for healthy new relationships.
Let me know if you have any other trail or relationship questions, and Happy New Year Steve.